Central Books Level 3 Resources Richard Brodie Virus of the Mind What’s
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Email Facts Of Life
- Big companies
don't do business via chain letter. Bill Gates is not giving you $1000,
and Disney is not giving you a free vacation. There is no baby food
company issuing class-action checks. You can relax; there is no need to
pass it on "just in case it's true". Furthermore, just because
someone said in the message, four generations back, that "we checked
it out and it's legit", does not actually make it true.
- There is no
kidney theft ring in New Orleans. No one is waking up in a bathtub full of
ice, even if a friend of a friend swears it happened to their cousin. If
you are hellbent on believing the kidney-theft ring stories, please see: http://urbanlegends.tqn.com/library/weekly/aa062997.htm
And I quote: "The National Kidney Foundation has repeatedly issued
requests for actual victims of organ thieves to come forward and tell
their stories. None have." That's "none" as in
"zero". Not even your friend's cousin.
- Neiman Marcus
doesn't really sell a $200 cookie recipe. And even if they do, we all have
it. And even if you don't, you can get a copy at: http://www.bl.net/forwards/cookie.html.
Then, if you make the recipe and decide the cookies are that awesome, feel
free to pass the recipe on.
- We all know all
500 ways to drive your roommates crazy, irritate co-workers, gross out
bathroom stall neighbors and creep out people on an elevator. We also know
exactly how many engineers, college students, Usenet posters and people
from each and every world ethnicity it takes to change a lightbulb, and
what the differences are between males and females.
- Even if the
latest NASA rocket disaster(s) DID contain plutonium that went to
particulate over the eastern seaboard, do you REALLY think this
information would reach the public via an AOL chain-letter?
- There is no
"Good Times" virus. In fact, you should never, ever, ever forward
any email containing any virus warning unless you first confirm it at an
actual site of an actual company that actually deals with virii. Try: http://www.av.ibm.com/current/FrontPage/
And even then, don't forward it. We don't care.
- If your CC:
list is regularly longer than the actual content of your message, you're
probably going to Hell.
- If you're using
Outlook, IE, or Netscape to write email, turn off the "HTML
encoding." Those of us on Unix shells can't read it, and don't care
enough to save the attachment and then view it with a web browser, since
you're probably forwarding us a copy of the Neiman Marcus Cookie Recipe anyway.
- If you still
absolutely MUST forward that 10th-generation message from a friend, at
least have the decency to trim the eight miles of headers showing everyone
else who's received it over the last 6 months. It sure wouldn't hurt to
get rid of all the ">" that begin each line. Besides, if it
has gone around that many times - we've probably already seen it.
- Craig Shergold
in England is not dying of cancer or anything else at this time and would
like everyone to stop sending him their business cards. He apparently is
also no longer a "little boy" either.
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